Things to do with Dead Parrots

[DaveL]

Well lads,

Last week, me beloved Macaw 'Percy', parked his feet in the air permanently. Once Oi be over me grief, Oi aves decided to put him to good use.

In this age of recyclable and reusable, Oi wuz wunderin what might be a suitable use for a dead parrot.

Oi wuz thinkin Oi could use 'im to hold a few of me cocktail mixin' implements for me on board bar.  Monty Pyton jokes aside - he'd make a great conversashun piece.

[Black Bart]

As ye thought of starchin out his wings and stickin one o those elastic band propelled propellors on him...ye can ave hours of fun flyin him round the poop deck.

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

Could use 'im to get taps into bung holes on yer keg. 'Ts whut I'd do.

[Griffin NoName]

Oi'd stuff 'im an' sit 'im in a chair in yer cabin wiv 'is bakk facin' the door an' change yer name ter Norman.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

Oi hope Percy wuz of the oimaginary koind of parrot, uhtherwise oi'm suhrry fer yer loss.
---
(mine are very much alive and screaming  )

[DaveL]

YArrrrgh...

Oi could squash im an use im as a beer coaster.

[pieces o nine]

Eagle lecterns be verra pop yule arrrr in these here parrrrts.
Mebbe ye could reporpoise im t'add a touch ov class t'yer deck wen yer barkin out orders, loike.

[anthrobabe]

Me kondolancas captain on your new status as owner of an ex-parrot.

1) ye kin ware 'im stuffed on ye sholder-- corse 'e mite clash wif all tha pink.

2) 'ide 'im in Black Barts beard for a rousing game 'o   "What be in Barts beard today"

3) If ye haves a fence whot needs paintin ye kin hattach 'im to a nice string and bribes ye mates to does it for ya (or wait, nevir mind-they be tha ones whot neds tha dead fing on a string to giveth to ye)  ol Gert goin on about 4 hours sleep-we still gots hevacuees in town-an Houstonians  be prone to party no matter whit.

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

Oi thought we could freeze dry him and bring him out when Granny pays a visit. She'll never know the difference.

[Bluenose]

Yarr, well Oi be finkin ye missed th' hobvius yuse.  Push a stick up 'is kyber and yuse 'im as a fevver dusta!

[Black Bart]

Arrr...make him into a shuttle cock an ave a game o badders on deck.

[DaveL]

YArrr...

How abouts using him as a feathered rugby ball?

[pieces o nine]

Yarrrgh, there be a 'orribull amownt ov krismuss orniments festoonin awl thee shoppes in me 'ome porrrt.


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Hit can onlie mean wun fing: Sandy Claws is comin t'town.
Agin.
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But if yer feelin festiv, ye ken himpayle yer parrot on top ov a krismuss tree. 'E moight be easier t'ketch than wun ov them anjils.

[Black Bart]

If I collect enough dead parrots I is plannin on stringin em tagevver ta make Xmas buntin:

[Griffin NoName]

Shame they be ded or they culd sing carrolls