Things to do with Dead Parrots

[DaveL]

Well lads,

Last week, me beloved Macaw 'Percy', parked his feet in the air permanently. Once Oi be over me grief, Oi aves decided to put him to good use.

In this age of recyclable and reusable, Oi wuz wunderin what might be a suitable use for a dead parrot.

Oi wuz thinkin Oi could use 'im to hold a few of me cocktail mixin' implements for me on board bar.  Monty Pyton jokes aside - he'd make a great conversashun piece.

[Black Bart]

As ye thought of starchin out his wings and stickin one o those elastic band propelled propellors on him...ye can ave hours of fun flyin him round the poop deck.

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

Could use 'im to get taps into bung holes on yer keg. 'Ts whut I'd do.

[Griffin NoName]

Oi'd stuff 'im an' sit 'im in a chair in yer cabin wiv 'is bakk facin' the door an' change yer name ter Norman.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

Oi hope Percy wuz of the oimaginary koind of parrot, uhtherwise oi'm suhrry fer yer loss.
---
(mine are very much alive and screaming  )

[DaveL]

YArrrrgh...

Oi could squash im an use im as a beer coaster.

[pieces o nine]

Eagle lecterns be verra pop yule arrrr in these here parrrrts.
Mebbe ye could reporpoise im t'add a touch ov class t'yer deck wen yer barkin out orders, loike.

[anthrobabe]

Me kondolancas captain on your new status as owner of an ex-parrot.

1) ye kin ware 'im stuffed on ye sholder-- corse 'e mite clash wif all tha pink.

2) 'ide 'im in Black Barts beard for a rousing game 'o   "What be in Barts beard today"

3) If ye haves a fence whot needs paintin ye kin hattach 'im to a nice string and bribes ye mates to does it for ya (or wait, nevir mind-they be tha ones whot neds tha dead fing on a string to giveth to ye)  ol Gert goin on about 4 hours sleep-we still gots hevacuees in town-an Houstonians  be prone to party no matter whit.

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

Oi thought we could freeze dry him and bring him out when Granny pays a visit. She'll never know the difference.

[Bluenose]

Yarr, well Oi be finkin ye missed th' hobvius yuse.  Push a stick up 'is kyber and yuse 'im as a fevver dusta!

[Black Bart]

Arrr...make him into a shuttle cock an ave a game o badders on deck.

[DaveL]

YArrr...

How abouts using him as a feathered rugby ball?

[pieces o nine]

Yarrrgh, there be a 'orribull amownt ov krismuss orniments festoonin awl thee shoppes in me 'ome porrrt.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Hit can onlie mean wun fing: Sandy Claws is comin t'town.
Agin.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


But if yer feelin festiv, ye ken himpayle yer parrot on top ov a krismuss tree. 'E moight be easier t'ketch than wun ov them anjils.

[Black Bart]

If I collect enough dead parrots I is plannin on stringin em tagevver ta make Xmas buntin:

[Griffin NoName]

Shame they be ded or they culd sing carrolls

[anthrobabe]

ye knows it be goin to be konfiscated when ye gits to that Chinese auforities rite? they not be lettin' that in the kuntry--- so don' paks it in ye seachest.

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

Is that their tail? Or are they just pleased to...arrr never mind

[Black Bart]

Got a web cam yet Dave?

[Griffin NoName]

Got a web cam yet Dave?

His parrot probably died pecking it to pieces.

[DaveL]

YArrrrr...

No Barty, but I've got Skype set up. Will probably get the camera in early December. Do I really need to dress like a pirate?

Now back to the dead parrots...

Note: The author of this post is convinced noone is quite aware of why Bart is asking irrelevant questions in a thread about dead parrots.

[Griffin NoName]

Note: The author of this post is convinced noone is quite aware of why Bart is asking irrelevant questions in a thread about dead parrots.

Bart be after a good floggin' fer lak o' dissiplin !  But 'e not be gettin' it so easy 

[Pachyderm]

Do we hav ter put in our rekwests fer a good floggin' in riting now?

[Griffin NoName]

Aye Laddie. The Vacation Commission be short o' work !

[Pachyderm]

But Oi divvent waant ter go on vakashun. Oi jest wants a good floggin'!

If'n Oi rites a note an' pins it ter the pub door, wooden that be good 'nuff?


*scratch, scratch, signs of feverish concentration*

Dun it. off ter the Benbow fer me....

[anthrobabe]

YArrrrr...

No Barty, but I've got Skype set up. Will probably get the camera in early December. Do I really need to dress like a pirate?

Now back to the dead parrots...

Note: The author of this post is convinced noone is quite aware of why Bart is asking irrelevant questions in a thread about dead parrots.

I sees the hintire fink now afore hit 'appens appearin on Arghtube when tha doins done be done. Sort o loik when that hindenburggy awhent up in flames
Oh tha 'umanity!

[Black Bart]

Aaarrgh...ye has made me think twice about the burnin Spaniards an the Flamin death dive in me livin room!

[nefyuBB]

ME PEERWIT NO DEED !

*sniff*

he juss havin nappy tyme .

[pieces o nine]

Look, matey, oi nose a dead parrit wen oi sees wun, an oi be lookin' hat wun roight now.

[Bluenose]

Nooo, 'e not be ded, he jess be pyenin fer the feeyords.  Beyutiful plumage...

[Bruder Cuzzen]

Parrot Withe Orange Sauce

Cooke thee bird in thee cauldron for twunny minits ( thee discriminatin' pyrate will pluck thee feathers an' remove thee guts ).

Glaze :
Squeeze thee guts an' blud owt of one orange inta a bowl, flay its skin and add to thee bowl along withe a haff cuppe of sugaRRRR .
Set aside one furd of glaze and reduce 40 per cint to be thee sauce .
Cover parrot with glaze and set in oven till bird is noicely browned and crispy .

Cut Polly in haff an' drizzle wiff thee sauce .
Serve wiff seaweed an' a side of Krackers .

Serves two (2).

[pieces o nine]

Yarrrgh, that be a foine ressippea, Bruder.

But wot kynde ov wyne wood ye wreck o mint t'surve wiv hit? 

[DaveL]

YArrrr...

How 'bout we try collecting them and selling them to the Natural History Museum. New Yorkers love their animals stuffed and immobile as possible!! Here kitty, kitty - NOT!!!

[Swatopluk]

Why has no film <i>38 uses for a dead parrot</i> been made yet (that should appeal to more people than the 37 sheep things)

http://piffl-medien.de/piffl_db_filme//37_uses_for_a_dead_sheep/images/37plakat_A6_250.jpg

[DaveL]

YArrrrr...

That certainly looks like a fascinatin place for a sheep to be recycled.  An' judgin' that Borat impersonator with the gun, O'id say that sheep's in a whole lotta trubble, dead or alive!

[nefyuBB]

me peerwit stull having nappy tyme 

wake ep burdy