waiting in lines

[pieces o nine]

I've been on both sides of this enough to know that no one is automatically on the moral high ground here.
Well, *I* am, but I digress... 

I was out picking up some cleaning supplies. The middle-aged clerk was very efficiently ringing orders, while running through her scripted speech as if she actually meant the lines for each customer:
Hi!
Did you find everything?
Is there anything else?
Do you have any coupons?
Cash or check?
Paper or plastic?
Do you want to make a donation to (charity of the month)?
Thank you, and you have a nice day!

An elderly lady (and not an anxious pensioner, by the looks of her) was line-jumping between two queues, managing to jump back into my line each time the clerk delivered another part of the scripted speech, in a friendly tone, while making eye contact with the customer in front of her.

In a voice quavering with indignation, she asked -- in a voice pitched to carry -- "Is she having a conversation  with him?"

I do not know why I appointed myself the vigilante here, but I turned around, smiled at Old Lady pleasantly, and in voice also pitched to carry, I answered, "No. She is doing her job. To the standards required by her employer for good customer service. What  is wrong  with you?"   Part of me is embarrassed for smiting an old lady who probably has problems of her own. Part of me felt very pleased with myself. A third part of me enjoyed the *extremely* fast and friendly service I received from the clerk when it was my turn...

I've seen bad waitstaff, bad clerks, bad receptionists, bad grand poubas. It happens too often and I don't 'reward' that behaviour. But I've been on the other side of public service enough to know that teh public  often dumps a lot of grief on these people in the belief that they have to take it.


Question:
How do you handle rude employees or rude customers violating your aura?
(Because I know Toadfish do not initiate the rudeness!) 

[Darlica]

I bet you made the clerks day with that comment!

Don't feel bad about smiting the old lady, she had it coming...

The connection I'm on right now is prone to close down now and then so I can't rant about people and their misunderstanding of concept of respect but in my book you did the right thing!

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

LOL at the old lady. Having dealt with enough annoying customers, I feel very little pity for her.


I don't let my irritation or anger show when dealing with certain types of customers.
Being the good little cog that I am, I make of show of being concerned, and ask what I can do to fix the issue. I've found it's often a case of them expecting us to read their minds (I'm afraid I haven't had time to take "Mind Reading for Baristas 101" just yet), and know they wanted x amount of caramel. Or not giving them their drink instantaneously.
I, however, have the ability to do most anything to make them happy, so it makes it easier.

[Bob in a quantum-state-of-faith]

....I'm afraid I haven't had time to take "Mind Reading for Baristas 101" just yet....

On the up side, if you DO learn to read their minds, it'll only take seconds... 

[Sibling Chatty]

As person dealing with rude customer?

I try to deal as swiftly and painlessly as possible, utilizing the phrase "If there's a problem, WE can fix it" making the customer a part of the solution, since they're already the freakin' problem...

In my chosen field, there was OFTEN the problem of a seasonal, perishable item NOT being available at the very moment a particular person wanted it. My response there was, "I'm afraid you'll have to take the seasonal availability of a fresh product up with the production manager. Will that be God or Mother Nature that I need to invoke for you?" all said with a gentle laugh.

If I had some moron that COULDN'T BELIEVE that I did NOT stock x dozen _____ color roses/rosebuds at all times, I tossed them a Jackson Perkins catalog, asked them to anticipate their rose needs for the next 2-3 years, guarantee that they'd buy them from me, and I'd order in their specific wants and needs. (Subtext: Asshole, if you don't remember your daughter's 16th birthday until 4:30 in the afternoon, don't be pissed at me for not reading your empty mind.) After all, there are 15-16 'colors' of roses, most with 2-5 'currently grown' varieties at any time of year, some with 7-12 varieties. Plus red ones... I buy roses by the bunch of 25. I sell 200 a week, mostly red. So, I MIGHT buy 2 bunches of 'other colors'. Yellow? Pink? Peach? Salmon? Terra-cotta? Green, Purple?? WHAT?? You agree to cover cost on my overage, I'll keep _____ on hand for you every day. Otherwise...have a NICE day.

A florist deals with people at emotionally vulnerable times. I was a past master at working with the customer to 'make it better' with what we had, even if it meant taking responsibility for THEIR total screw-ups. ("Yes, Ma'am, your husband ordered yellow roses, but the ones at the wholesalers were just horrible. Rather than send out bad roses, I chose to send the pale cream with the pink edge, and when the crops of yellows are from the new fields, probably next Monday, I'll send the yellow ones on." In the mean time, husband, who dropped by an 1 PM, after the last deliveries had left the wholesalers, has paid for the on-hand roses AND the "proper" ones she'd get Monday PM. I fix it, but I don't PAY for it...)

Until the customer gets rude. Or insulting. Then I adopt the old bartenders mantra. GTFO NOW!! Get out, X3, then I call a cop. (You don't want to know how many rude, arrogant [especially the wealthy ones] assholes think that they can get what they want by being dicks.)

I once had the pleasure of telling GHWB that unless he called BEFORE 4 PM, we really couldn't get a dozen yellow roses to Bar, 38 miles away, by 5 PM, unless HE provided the helicopter, or unless he'd pay for a Secret Service guy to red-light them. I met the SS chopper at the helipad of the closest hospital...and, yes, I DID charge him a $15 rush delivery charge to take them 12 blocks.

If I'm the customer...I'm generally patient, until it's obvious that the person's being intentionally rude. Then I come across as THE Bitch, tell them WHY they're an ass, and walk out. Ask the Wal-Mart manager that had to put up 2 full baskets of my "shop for the homebound" shopping at the Bryan Wal-Mart--over Dan going to get the car while I waited with $396 worth of stuff just outside the door, where they did NOT want their precious Handi-Cart to go after dark. A difference of 3 feet, and the door lady was a bitch, then the manager was a TOTAL ass. THEN they had to refund money on 5 different accounts (I carry these people's check cards...) AND put up the stuff.

Then I noted that I came, in my crummy green van, TWICE A MONTH and spent at least that much...more if anybody needed much in the way of detergent, HBA, harware, etc.---with our stuff, about $1,200 a month that I was spending there instead of Brenham. (I know, Wal-Mart's evil, but it's also within the budget of the elderly, handicapped, etc.)

The next day, I called Bentonville.

You can be tired and surly, and I'll commiserate with you. Act an ass, and I'll decapitate you, stuff poo down your neck and hot glue your neck to your butt.

Be condescending?? You won't live to see your next breath... See also, Tiffany's, Galleria, Houston and the major heart attack when they'd ignored me for 45 minutes, until everyone else was being waited on, so I RAISED my voice when I said "I'm so sorry you're all so busy, but my husband's cuff links have broken yet AGAIN, and the lovely gentleman in New York said you could repair them."

The lookey-loos all got interested, and there was a manager with me in a moment's notice. Yes, the THIRD repair on my late husband's gold cuff links was handled rather nicely...especially after I said "Oh, no, I'll come back next week to get them. I would rather have it done correctly instead of quickly." They gave me this lovely silver hand mirror for causing me so much trouble...

[Bob in a quantum-state-of-faith]

The next day, I called Bentonville.

You ever hear back about that?

I once did something similar-- it was roughly $150 in groceries, and I was looking for a short line, when I overheard the line manager say to one of her flunkies, that the lines were TOO SHORT, and to send some of the checkers out to stock.

Too short?

I excused myself, and asked her if she was serious-- she was.

I then said, "well, then you can re-stock this, I won't be buying it today or anytime in the future"

I then went and filled out a comment card and mailed it off.

I never did hear back, though.

[Sibling Chatty]

I've heard back from Bentonville.

First time, over 9 years ago. Then again about 6 years ago, then this time.

Bentonville is VERY sensitive to certain pressures, especially from the handicapped community.

9 years ago, it was a store manager saying "If the c-word doesn't like it" when the c-work in question read lips...WELL. That was because of their earnest wish to prevent a lawsuit. An ADA lawsuit, to be specific.

Since then, my name triggers someone's ADA sensors.

Bentonville is VERY attentive to my complaints. They usually fire someone...

[Bob in a quantum-state-of-faith]

I've heard back from Bentonville.

First time, over 9 years ago. Then again about 6 years ago, then this time.

Bentonville is VERY sensitive to certain pressures, especially from the handicapped community.

9 years ago, it was a store manager saying "If the c-word doesn't like it" when the c-work in question read lips...WELL. That was because of their earnest wish to prevent a lawsuit. An ADA lawsuit, to be specific.

Since then, my name triggers someone's ADA sensors.

Bentonville is VERY attentive to my complaints. They usually fire someone...

LOL!

Years ago, when one of the Super Walmarts first opened, they used to have these promenent posters everywhere:

"Speedy checkout guaranteed"

They were everywhere-- on the sides of the register-stands, up on the walls, all over.

Once, I had to wait 45 minutes or more to get entirely through the line.   Since my evening was thereby ruined, I decided to test the "guarantee", and with my just-purchased cart of groceries, I looked up a manager.

I stated, politely, "I want to take you up on your speedy checkout guarantee"

Dimwitted manager, "what?"

Me, pointing to the huge banner, "The speedy checkout guarantee.  I had to wait 45 minutes.  That is not speedy.  I want my guarantee."

Dimwit, "what guarantee?"

Me, pointing again to the sign, "that one.  The one that guarantees a speedy checkout.  I want to cash-in, or whatever."

Dimwit, "cash in?"

Me, "yes.  The sign specifically makes a binding promise to me, your customer.  I did NOT have a speedy checkout.  I want the compensation, whatever it is, that is guaranteed by your sign."

Dimwit, "there is no compensation"

Me, "then, it's not a guarantee, is it? Can I speak to a higher manager than you, please?" (I can be persistent-- if they were going to waste MY time, by golly _I_ was gonna waste THEIRS)

Anyway, the scenario repeats until I had the store manager's ear for a time.

Eventually, I got him to admit that the sign did not actually guarantee ANYTHING.  It was a delight to see that painful admission.  He DID apologize, though, and that was nice.  He also gave me a $10-off coupon, also nice.

The next time I went to shop there, about a month later, all the "speedy checkout"  banners were gone.

Score one for the little guy. 

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

LOL, nice. Love it when Mal-Mart has to do something like that.


When I'm the customer, I tend to take the situation into consideration more than anything. If you just had an a-hole customer, I'll commiserate, and let it be. If you're tired, I'll let it be. But if you're rude, I'll walk out. If you ignore me, I'll take my business else where, and spread word that you suck. If you're condescending to me, I'll turn it around on you, and make you look the idiot.

A couple days ago, I went to a different Starbucks than usual (I have three that I frequent). I wanted a double shot with some flavoring, a bit of half and half, and this new fangled energy booster. Not hard to write down.
The kid behind the counter, in a condescending sort of way, asked me a bunch of stupid questions while he tried to format my request in terms of the new drinks we just added, even though that's not what I asked for. I had also already dropped my employee card on the counter, and he saw me do it. He looked a bit confused when I asked him why he was charging me for syrup, so I asked him how long he'd been with us, and just generally put him on the defensive, making him look like a stoopid noob in front of his boss.
Got the wrong drink because he's an idiot (too much half and half), and even though my inner barista was screeching at me for just taking the drink and leaving, I did it anyway. I was in a hurry, and his moronic, rude questions took FAR too much time.