How to solve climate change

[ivor]

Drat! Again my post was eaten.

Use some of those excess nukes to battle global warming with nukkular winter.

Mad scientist/politician alert: This is a real-world idea that Bush hopefully hasn't heard about yet or he will justify his nukes-on-Iran folly as a decisive act against both terrorism and climate change.

How was your post eaten?  Let me know cause I don't see errors in the error log.  Well I guess I should look again.

[Griffin NoName]

Presumably it was Goat.

[ivor]

Must have been.  No errors in the log.

[Swatopluk]

Happened several times in the last few days that I posted but the post did not appear (and I did not just use preview and forgot to actually click POST)

[ivor]

You forgot to click post?

[goat starer]

This has happened to me too on a few occasions recently. click post and it looks like it has gone through but does not appear.

I did not eat any posts although I wanted to!

[Sibling Lambicus the Toluous]

Climate change solution:

Swap the "cold" months between the northern and southern hemispheres.  i.e.:

Old:

Jan

Feb

Mar

Apr

May

Jun

Jul

Aug

Sep

Oct

Nov

Dec

New - N:

Jul2

Aug2

Sep2

Apr

May

Jun

Jul

Aug

Sep

Apr2

May2

Jun2

New - S:

Jan

Feb

Mar

Oct2

Nov2

Dec2

Jan2

Feb2

Mar2

Oct

Nov

Dec

That'll solve everything!  I mean, look at today: it's way too warm here for December, but it's actually cold for June II!  What global warming?! 

[Swatopluk]

In the same vein: Change the temperature scale (from Celsius to Reaumur already saves 20%)

[Sibling Lambicus the Toluous]

Take a cue from Winnie the Pooh and hire people to wander the streets saying, "tut, tut.  Looks like snow."

[Swatopluk]

Get the worst weather forecaster you can find and let him predict hot weather on a permanent base.

[Bluenose]

Its obvious that all that ice at the poles is in the wrong place - no need to cool the poles, is there?  So break all the ice sheets up and tow them to the equator where they can be of some use!

[Swatopluk]

And get some extra ice from the Saturn moons (nod to Futurama)

[Sibling Lambicus the Toluous]

Encourage tailgating*




*There is some theoretical foundation for this.  If you can fit in more cars per mile at a given speed, then this increases the capacity of the road in cars per hour as well.  Since the auto volumes stay the same and the capacity increases, congestion would go do down, and vehicle emissions would decrease as well!

So... next time someone flips you the bird for riding their bumper, at the next stoplight politely explain that you're doing your part for the environment!   

[Griffin NoName]

Always exhale into a paper bag.

[Swatopluk]

Change the moon orbit in a way that there is a daily eclipse. That will cool down the area. Moving the moon nearer to Earth (it's escaping!) would increase the effect.

I know at least one person that actually thinks we should prepare a change in the Earth orbit to avoid us being all grilled when the Sun goes red giant. I think we have problems a bit more time sensitive right now.