Pirate Statue Cursed

[Aphos]

Yes, dear fellow pirates, the lurvly stachew was on display in a quiet PA town, when an irate Catholic priest placed a curse upon it.

    Father Commolly commanded the owners to remove it.

    "He pointed to the statue and very dictatorially and said, 'I curse you. I curse this place. I want to see this destroyed. I want her destroyed,'" said pirate owner Peggy Kanigoski.

http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2009/04/i_want_this.php

http://www.wnep.com/wnep-schyl-pirate-statue-controversy,0,1030598.story

[Darlica]

I think it's incredible greedy of him to begrudge everybody else something just because he can't have it...

She's pretty and a if she is a genuine wood carving she's also an excellent display of craftsmanship.
If I was more piratly inclined and had the space I could very well have her or a sister of hers standing in the living room (thinking about it a mermaid pirate would be ever cooler), she'd make a great conversation piece at parties.

[ivor]

Just like the Taliban and the Buddhist statue only less explosives. 

[Opsa]

She's a foin piece o' work.

Imagine them priests condemning witchcraft an' then goin round cursing things. It aint natural, I tells ya!

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

Nothing like the re-talibanization of the catholic church, I imagine the excommunication of scientists will be followed by a new version of the unholy inquisition.

Can't they go back to the middle ages without taking us with them? 

[Bluenose]

Oi bin shokked.  That thar statchew be a foine peece o' werke, an quite modestly dressed in Moi oppinyun.  Oi jess doan see wot that crazee preest be on abowt.  Iffen he be tutchin that lady Oi be sujestin we shuld be declarin war on 'im and let 'im feel sum cold steel.  That wuld show 'im wot 'appens to them wots disrespecks the poirates!

[The Meromorph]

Aaaarrrgh! Cold Steel! They don't like it up 'em, yer knows.

Oi thinks we should engrave pichers o' little alt'r bhoys on usn's cutlasses, too!

[Aphos]

Aye.  She be a foine healthy lass, buxoom and bouncy.  Now why would a priest be wointin' ter curse her when it's clear that all she wants to do is make people happy and stop global warmin'.

[Opsa]

Wot say we go an "reskew" this foin lady 'n 'nvoit er to be our figgerhead? Yer cawnt curse us, seein as how we's pertected by the Honorable Order of Toadfish, ere. Plus, we'd have political sanctuary an the loik.

[Griffin NoName]

Aye.  She be a foine healthy lass, buxoom and bouncy.  Now why would a priest be wointin' ter curse her when it's clear that all she wants to do is make people happy and stop global warmin'.

Oi dusnt no abowt that; Oi be finkin' she be h'aiming ter rayze the temperature

[Aphos]

Aye.  She be a foine healthy lass, buxoom and bouncy.  Now why would a priest be wointin' ter curse her when it's clear that all she wants to do is make people happy and stop global warmin'.

Oi dusnt no abowt that; Oi be finkin' she be h'aiming ter rayze the temperature

Aye.  But that be only locally.  As a dues payin' pirate lady, she's woikin' to stop GLOBAL warmin'

[Griffin NoName]

'appen she 'av foine globes too

[anthrobabe]

an all wif out an hunderwire too!

I agreez we nedz to bringes her home to tha mon'stery for safe haven an refuge frum opressin

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

Me thinks she oughter just turn 'er luverly pistols 'pon that silly priest.

[Aphos]

Aye.  Methinks if she puts 'er min' to it, he twouldn't be no priest no more.

[DaveL]

YArrrrrr...

Sometimes I wished Oi was that wood carver. Carving those lumpy bits would be such a treat!

[Darlica]

Oi think ye got the right mota motvasion motivation to carve buxom lasses out of wood.

[Bruder Cuzzen]

Just finking 'bowt 'er makes me wood harrrd ... to widdle wiff that is .

[DaveL]

Oi think ye got the right mota motvasion motivation to carve buxom lasses out of wood.

YArrrrr...

Tis true Capn Darlica. One of those on a long voyage would have gone down well.  That reminds of a song by the Police 'Be my girl Sally'

I was blue and lonely, I couldnt sleep a wink
And I could only get unconscious if Id had to much to drink
There was somehow, something wrong somewhere
And each day seemed grey and dead
The seeds of desperation were growing in my head
I needed inspiration, a brand new start in life
Somewhere to place affection, but I didnt want a wife
And then by lucky chance I saw in a special magazine
An ad that was unusual, the like Id never seen
Experience something different with our new imported toy
Shes loving, warm, inflatible and a guarantee of joy.
She came all wrapped in cardboard, all pink and shrivelled down
A breath of air was all she needed to make her lose that frown
I took her to the bedroom and pumped her with some life
And later in a moment that girl became my wife
And so I sit her in the corner and sometimes stroke her hair
And when Im feeling naughty I blow her up with air
Shes cuddly and shes bouncy, shes like a rubber ball
I bounce her in the kitchen and I bounce her in the hall
And now my life is different since sally came my way
I wake up in the morning and have her on a tray
Shes everything they say she was and I wear a permanent grin
And I only have to worry in case my girl wears thin

That wooden statue is Sally's precursor.

[Opsa]

Funny, it reminds me uvver song as well.

Oi fink it was from "Moy Fair Loidy". Went sompin loik:

"Wooden teat be loverly..."

[nefyuBB]

HOBOY !

ya sing good !

ye kan b me opinion awk !

an ya kin haff sum ove tha shinny buttins fer pay !