How to solve climate change

[Griffin NoName]

During the day plants consume carbon dioxide and produce oxygen but during the night they use a different process consuming parts of the day output.

Sounds like they modelled themselves on the electric storage heater. 

[Griffin NoName]

Apologies for double post but I just thought of another way to solve climate change.

Have an International agreement that space exploration will only be done during the day so they wouldn't need to have any lights on in the space craft.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

On a related but more serious note, I heard in the radio that some Nasa engineers proposed using high altitude planes leaving water vapor trails during the day (consistent with the findings of the post 9-11 plane grounding).

[Swatopluk]

At least better than that (real world) idea of shooting sulphur into the upper atmosphere as a coolant.

[Griffin NoName]

Force everyone to watch Superstorm. Capture the combined rise in blood pressure and use it to divert climate change to another planet.

[Sibling Lambicus the Toluous]

Lengthen all factory smokestacks so that all pollution is expelled directly into space.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

That reminds me of the *idea* I had years ago regarding the ozone layer: If ozone is a pollutant at ground level why not expelling with very high smokestacks? Or move the plants to the south pole...

[Griffin NoName]

I just transfered my video recording of Millenium Night to DVD and was thinking banning fireworks on Milleniums would help.

[beagle]

That reminds me of the *idea* I had years ago regarding the ozone layer: If ozone is a pollutant at ground level why not expelling with very high smokestacks?

Or put all the laser printers up there and have the printout fall back.

I just transfered my video recording of Millenium Night to DVD and was thinking banning fireworks on Milleniums would help.

Nah, all the smoke helps with global dimming. That's why we need volcanoes and wars too.

I won't let off any fireworks next millenium if you don't. probably just time to get the legislation through if we start now.

[Griffin NoName]

The daffodils are out in Kew Gardens a whole MONTH early. Nuke daffs !!!!!

[Griffin NoName]

Eat Baked Mini Cheddars.

With each one eaten, hold breath while munching.

On swallowing, swallow breath as well.

Swallow as many as possible without compromising the outlet at the rear end of your body.

As quickly as possible, encase your body in non-permeative zipper suit.

Jump into pre-prepared lead lined box, preferably on a pre-exisiting landfill site. Close auto-locking lid.

[Scriblerus the Philosophe]

And hope you don't die.


Set up giant, giant fans on every mountain range on the planet. Power it by putting all bankers, congressmen/Parliamentarians, bureaucratic officiasl, and all cabinet, staff, and governmental board of every nation, for three hours every in rotation, on a wheel. Like the ones you find in hamster cages. Also include rodent water bottles and pellets made of my grandmother's granola (you can trek across the planet with it, but it tastes like shite).

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

Move all human population to heights of 4000mts/12000ft or higher*. Less O₂ breathed, less CO₂ created.

* as a side benefit malaria will be eradicated.

[Swatopluk]

Organize a meeting of Sarah Palin with the comittee of Polar Bears on neutral ground (e.g. an ice floe in the Bering Strait). No firearms allowed.

[Griffin NoName]

Stop all the glaciologists, seismologists and cliamtologists from going to Greenland and spreading their body heat.