How to solve climate change

[Swatopluk]

All exhausts (including breathing) should be aimed at the sun*, so the recoil moves us slowly into an orbit farther from it (and therefore cooler).

*For maximum effectiveness it would be slightly off-center but that might be too complicated for most people. Other directions are not advisable because we don't want to meddle with the daily rotation period or the orbit shape.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

...or by extension, remove all human population from the hemispheres during their respective winters.

[Swatopluk]

Pour white paint (non-toxic preferable) on the ocean surface to increase the albedo

[Opsa]

The US Republican party seems to be an inexhaustible source of energy- they waste enough of it complaining about absolutely everything. Do you think it could be harnessed and used as alternative fuel? We would never have to mine  fossil fuel again.

[ivor]

Would that be Neothermal energy?   We need to start a company for that!  Neoron?

[Aggie]

More like Neaderthermal energy.

(no disrespect to our heavy-browed relatives)



On a serious note, does anyone know where I can get a truck-mounted portable flash pyrolysis unit?

[Swatopluk]

I Think the GOP mainly produces entropic heat that can't be used

[ivor]

We could boil them down for their oil and burn that...

[Swatopluk]

I think we already had that. Too toxic.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

Incredibly there isn't a viable way to extract energy from such loud repetitive behavior.

"Sticks and stones can break my bones but your words can't hurt me" might have worked in elementary school but it's amazing how much damage some words can do after repeating them thousands of times.

Given that the only way to extract energy from them would involve fusion of heavy elements, the whole discussion is, well, a waste of energy.
--
A veritable way to solve climate change would involve gags in some key mouths.

[Swatopluk]

Leading US conservatives are colder than ice. Drop them in the Arctic and ask them to show empathy.

[Griffin NoName]

Have a financial recession.

[Swatopluk]

Equip all cattle with an afterburner* to get rid of the methane.

in German the anus is known as the After btw

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

They'll need a forward-burner too, they burp methane.

[Swatopluk]

Yeah, I know but it does not sound as funny.
And how can they eat if the things is in front of their feeding hole. Maybe the catalysator has to be installed in their esophagus or first stomach.