Xtian Assumptions

[Swatopluk]

Why not Pykrete?
At the intended size it would have easily lasted the intended 40 days (and with constant cloud cover and rain it was probably not that warm in the first place). This would also explain the absence of large wood remains on Mt.Ararat.

[Aggie]

You could make a similar substance with hay and ice, to provide fresh feed and bedding for the animals as the top melted.

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

But still not cold enough for pykrete to survive.

[Swatopluk]

You could make a similar substance with hay and ice, to provide fresh feed and bedding for the animals as the top melted.

I thought the saw dust would at least serve for the bedding part

But still not cold enough for pykrete to survive.

The US test ship survived one full summer a 1000 ts. The Ark, which was far bigger, had to last less than 2 months (no data in what season the Flood took place*) . And a deity that was able to rise water levels by more than 8 km in 40 days should have been able to provide a few cold spells round the thing.

*the Sumerian Ark was probably launched in late autumn. Reed for boats is traditionally cut in August because then it floats best and lasts longest. The hut that provided the building material for the first stage would not have been enough for the full ship, so Utnapishtim would have had to get some fresh reed. The time between cutting and launching would depend on the drying time. So, he likely ordered fresh reed to be cut and dried while he started the building with the material from the hut. When that was used up the first delivery of new reed was probably ready. Meanwhile the animal catching was underway too. So my estimate is that all was ready in late October or early November. The flood would have subsided in time for the spring bloom, so the animals disembarking from the Ark would easily find fresh food. Another sign that  Enki was a better organizer than Jahweh.

[Griffin NoName]

How did they get the two pandas to breed? They are notoriously difficult.

Or should that be in the Easy Questions thread?

[Sibling Zono (anon1mat0)]

8 km sounds too much but how about 500mts/1km? I guess the height could be any number, 10 mts is enough to cover a (not so) small town that would be perceived as the end of the world. Babylon is only 35mts above sea level so a 50 mt raise would've meant the end for most of the known world, more considering that the mountains are far away enough (both to the east or the north west).

Obviously the literal approach is untenable and the historical one... well, there was a flood of the rivers, and some trader with his boat with goats ended up well into the gulf and survived to tell the tale. 

[Swatopluk]

Utnapishtim probably landed in what is today Bahrein.

Iirc the flood went over the top of all mountains. Do not forget that the Ark stranded at the summit of Mt.Ararat (>5000m), the Quran is more modest with another mountain of only 2100m.
Of course the flood could have been a wandering depression just fast enough not to allow anyone to run out of.

[Swatopluk]

Btw, a novel explanation why animals can be gay, although they are not directly recruited by the homosexual agenda through TV and advertisement:
http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2012/05/18/former-navy-chaplain-insists-gay-demons-can-infect-animals/

[pieces o nine]

^   sigh.....



methinks te gentleman doth protest -- entirely -- too much

[Griffin NoName]

Of course we don't know about the animals' advertising campaigns - they are bound to have made them secret.

[Swatopluk]

I was going to say that religious fundies do not believe in animals having the capability for that but then I remembered the guys calling for renewed animal trials (leading e.g. to the stoning of orcas and the extinction of bearkind*)


*they are great proponents of collective punishment, i.e. not just perpetrators of evil but their whole family too

[Roland Deschain]

I love the Noah's Ark story, especially all the special pleading that inevitably has to go with it. I've been privy to several threads about the subject on Facebook, the discussion taking place between Christians (mostly fundie, with a smattering of Catholics and other denominations), pagans, and atheists/agnostics. My favourite special pleadings are the following, but please note these are put into my own words:-

• Where did all the rain come from? - It's been proven that there was a huge water vapour cloud covering the Earth at that time.
  
• Could you provide this proof, please? - *gives link to answersingenesis.com*
  
• How could all those animals have fit on the Ark? - They were all young ones, so took up less room.
  
• No, seriously, how could all those animals have fit on the Ark? - God did it. Also there were less species back then, all current ones having diverged from them (only micro-evolution, before you become excited).
  
• What about all the food? (apart from the Termites) - God made it so they didn't need to eat, or not eat much.
  
• What about all the poo? - God had them starve themselves before going on. Also see previous point.
  
• Where did all the water go? - It went into underground caverns.
  
• Err, do you realise exactly how much water that is? It's multiples of what there is now in all the oceans - God did it.
  
• What about all the saltwater fish who suddenly had an influx of freshwater? - *ignores comment or mumbles something incoherent about the power of God*
  
• What about all the other flood myths, such as in the Epic of Gilgamesh? - They were all copied from the Biblical Flood, or spread by Satan.
  
• But what about... - God did it, ad infinitum.
  

That pretty much sums up the explanations. It's such a shame that none of them really make any sense.

Oh yeah. Gay demons infecting animals?

EDIT: Whenever I hear, read, or say "Noah's Ark", I always think of "Noah's Arcade" from Wayne's World, complete with that awesome interview scene between Wayne and the owner. He blows goats...I have proof.

[Swatopluk]

Some more modern fundies (claim to) believe that Noah stored all those creatures in embryonic form. Easy with bird eggs but into which animal did Noah implant all those embryos after the trip.
My guess is, it were the female dinosaurs. But Noah implanted too many at a time, so they did not survive giving birth to so many kids (even if they were not born Alien-like or by Caesarean section).

[Griffin NoName]

If it were put into bird eggs, were they chicken? and if so, why did we not have flu jabs centuries ago?

Also, we only know there were dinosaurs around with Noah because the world was only created 600 yeras ago or something otherwise it would not work.

Fundamentally (sic) this is all about miracles, don't you think?

[Swatopluk]

If God does it it means it is not miraculous