Toadfish Monastery

Dear Keepers of the Sekrit IT Sekrits:

So I was typing up this question last night when the Monastery abruptly went under-cover-AWOL. Let's see if I make more progress this time, as I hope that wasn't the Great Whatever hinting that my question is silly...

How does the Monastery (or any other site) 'know' which threads are new to me each time I log on?  Moreover, the Monastery even 'knows' which post within a thread I read last! This is incredible, or worrisome, perhaps depending upon one's level of paranoia.

I am curious how this process works and am willing to exchange sekrit knowledge in my own arcane fields of Pleasing Color Theory, or Why Some Type Faces Are Legible at Any Size, or What Is Up with the Mona Lisa's Eyebrows, that sort of thing...

Signed,
Anxiously awaiting a "Show unread posts since last visit" update in the Ocean o'Sand

New Hampshire Lawmakers Pass Law Allowing Parental Objections To Curriculum

QuoteThe Tea Party dominated New Hampshire Legislature on Wednesday overrode the governor's veto to enact a new law allowing parents to object to any part of the school curriculum.

The state House voted 255-112 and Senate 17-5 to enact H.B. 542, which will allow parents to request an alternative school curriculum for any subject to which they register an objection. Gov. John Lynch (D) vetoed the measure in July, saying the bill would harm education quality and give parents control over lesson plans.

"For example, under this bill, parents could object to a teacher's plan to: teach the history of France or the history of the civil or women's rights movements," Lynch wrote in his veto message. "Under this bill, a parent could find 'objectionable' how a teacher instructs on the basics of algebra. In each of those cases, the school district would have to develop an alternative educational plan for the student. Even though the law requires the parents to pay the cost of alternative, the school district will still have to bear the burden of helping develop and approve the alternative. Classrooms will be disrupted by students coming and going, and lacking shared knowledge."

The willful stupidity hydra rears another head.     

Living through a social change is always stressful, regardless of which side one backs. From what I've read of past changes, ordinary people fear that the dissension will split the group irrevocably, and I take heart from that. Perhaps we won't  be fissured into The United States of Canada and Jesusland, after all. But I wonder if there will be a worse alternative (from my perspective, at least): Jesusland, period.

Jewish gender segregation campaign turns violent

It is distressing that we have so many well-documented studies -- some of them quite old -- proving that the better a society treats its females, the better off it is as a whole, and yet! There are *still* frightened, angry enclaves all over the world trying to put the wimmins in their place, dammit. Here's just another one, made all the sadder to my mind as this nation was artificially created as a haven for those who were oppressed quite cruelly, under the excuse of deeply held religious beliefs of others...



I grew up indoctrinated with the idea that religious freedom (and matters of conscience) must *never* be tampered with by the larger society, let alone government. But the older I get, the more I think that the world would be better off if every man who righteously bemoaned contamination from girl cooties could be ['magically'] isolated from any and all contact with females whatsoever, for so long as he lived. Shades of The Gate to Women's Country,  but I wonder how long it would take to breed out such tendencies? A long, long, long time, no doubt.

There is no reason to avoid comedy, even in discussing current events. To that end, I give you
World Penis Size Map Is Hard News to Swallow

QuoteThis sure explains a lot about Americans though.

This new chart clears up all my questions about all the big giant trucks and ridiculously enormous houses. It might also explain our love of gun racks, Sylvester Stallone, and the Super Bowl (whatcha gonna fill that big bowl with, huh?). And this really helps me understand Big Macs and Super Sizing and Big Gulps and especially that monstrous SUPER Big Gulp. You know what they say, right?

Of course, it also might explain why we're in three wars right now. To our mere 5.1 American inches, Iraq has 5.7 inches, Afghanistan has 5.3 inches, and Libya has 5.4 inches. You can sorta see why we felt the need to get out the big bombs.

So, my lifetime of suspicions is borne out by cold, hard data...     

These people don't deserve capital letters for the topic discussing them.



There is a family group traveling around this area, stuffing Klan recruitment cards into the merchandise in a wide array of local businesses. They've been caught and expelled from some (including the entire mall) but I didn't know about it until a distressed customer brought me a handful of cards which had been jammed into the art books and tablets she had been browsing. When I informed my boss he laughed it off dismissively with a *very* strangely worded response that *sounded* as if he supported them.

I know him well enough to guess that this was his (poor) attempt at frustrated humor; but it left me quite gob-smacked for a moment, with the customer standing in front of me waiting for a response from the other ed of the store phone. If I didn't know him as well as I think I do, I would have taken his weird statements about "the rights to free speech" and "they are my friends, after all" at face value. Other employees either found the cards independently or had upset customers hand them over, and we discussed it amongst ourselves until he broke down and made an announcement after closing that he knew about it and had received an epistle (my term, not his) from corporate that we were to just throw them away. Also, if we found anyone stuffing these noxious PoS into merchandise (again, my term, not his) we were to inform a manager who would "politely request that they leave the store".

Really?

That's it?




How about *telling* them to get out and not come back. Calmly and coldly.

How about joining with the other business owners/managers in placing an ad in the local paper that the undersigned most emphatically do *not* support this and will not tolerate hate group harassment on their premises. Maybe the paper could go crazy and discount or even donate a full page to do this.

How about a non-sensationalized bit on the news with PSA-type advice on what to do if approached by these people. (Don't over-react, don't allow yourself to be provoked into 'assaulting' *them*, etc.)

How about a bit in the sermon from local pastors about the incompatibility of hate groups and 'real' Christianity.

Because silence in a red-state area like this, with a population intellectually and culturally isolated and pandered to by Faux News and Tea Partiers, silence in the face of hate group incursion is not the way to "ignore" them into going away.

It implies consent.

Because you've all been so good, here's a little story to brighten your day...

Quote from: someone famous It  made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me glad I have sworn to *never* mow a lawn!

So, V was up at the crack of dawn today to do some serious rummage damage (suburb/-wide garage sale today) and returned just as I was getting ready for work, to announce the purchase of a riding lawn mower. (She is *actively* planning to remove almost all the sod in the back yard to create landscapamatic flower & shrubbery berms with quaint, winding stone & brick paths amongst them, and already has a lawnmower which works just fine -- except is still needs a bag -- and except you have to push it instead of riding like all the more upperly-crusty neighbors, but I digress...) I was to drive her back to the seller so she could then drive the mower home. I have *exactly* one hour and five minutes to be at work at this point, and am not ready yet. It would never occur to me to... but I digress.

So we're driving around one of the typical US sub-divisions (all cul-de-sacs and mini mc-mansions and overly winding streets so you can't see more than 3 houses ahead) and she can't quite remember where the house is.  Driving... driving... driving... okaaaaaaay...

Now we're at a house! But wait -- it's a *different* sale! Money is handed over for other purchases bid on earlier and they are stashed next to other great finds in the cargo hold, additional neighborly garage sale small talk is commenced, leisurely walking around is done looking at more cute objets du crappe. pieces begins to radiate tension. Oh! Look at this here! Do you need one of these? No. One of these? No. One of these? NO.

And we're off again! Finally at the mower house, handing over money for it, more neighborly, we've got all damn day just to stand around discussing the relative merits of this or that thing-a-ma-jig friendly small talk. Oh! Look at this here! Do you need one of these? No. One of these? No. One of these? NO. pieces radiates extreme tension, returns to car, and starts engine. Housemate cheerily announces she will race me on the mower.

I get home and set a new land-speed record for getting ready for work. In the distance I hear the sounds of someone doing motocross with a lawnmower. Try to block it out. Suddenly an ... odd ... noise, *quite* nearby, then... silence. I attempt to grab my purse and keys and escape like Papillon, but no luck. V heads me off to announce she has had "an accident".

I determine that she is not injured and follow her out to see what happened. It appears that she approached the rather abrupt graded curve that leads to back yard (and walk-out basement) at an imprudent rate of speed and DROVE THE LAWNMOWER OFF THE EDGE OF A RETAINING WALL, taking out the ENTIRE TOP ROW of heavy, ornamental concrete blocks with a combination of spinning tires and the blade housing itself. Lawnmower is now BETWEEN ONE AND THREE FEET LOWER than (depending on position along what remains of) the retaining wall, aimed at one of MY WINDOWS, and more or less stopped abruptly against the fence to the next drop down of the back yard. Oh yeah, baby, SHE ALMOST DROVE THAT SUCKER RIGHT INTO MY ROOM. To fully appreciate the scene, picture that the terrace section the mower has stopped on is  *not* very much larger than the mower itself, and her new plan is for me to help her push it back up a narrow neck of lawn that rises, steeply, along the retaining wall to meet the neighbor's yard, where she will... um... do... something else... that I decide I really don't need to know about at this point.

So V is reassembling the retaining wall to clear a path to push this monster backwards and putting it into "free wheel" (or so she claims; this is the person who, back in college, once demonstrated her gun-ho 'Now I'm safe from criminals out here on the range!' handgun skills to me after flamboyently clicking the safety 'off' -- but when nothing happened I checked it to discover she had clicked the safety 'on'), but I digress again. So we're pushing on the mower like fellaheen during Pyramid Building Season and getting NO WHERE. Oh! Maybe there are some blocks missing from the restored retaining wall. Could they be... WEDGED UNDER THE MOWER? Why yes, they could, indeed. So now she's flailing her arm around under there in this tiny landing with too-little maneuvering space and I back away while decisively *refusing* to have any more to do with this. (I do not have the stomach --nor the time-- to hold her arm in a wet, ice-packed towel and drive her to the hospital to get it sewn back on, if this goes pear-shaped.)

But-- not to worry, she's freed the block wedged under there somewhere and it's HEAVE! FELLAHEEN, HEAVE! The mower begins its ponderous, backwards journey up this stupid strip of sod and... IT'S UP!   Yays.  Now she's hopped back on (still in her FLIP FLOPS) and is attempting to start the engine and leave the neighbor's back yard to go... somewhere... (our back yard is completely fenced off for the dogs and the gate is not installed yet). No, don't ask. Really, trust me on this. Let's just say that the cost of finishing the fence to the HOA Holy Rules and install the Approved Gate (for such items as lawnmowers) almost exactly equals what has just been diverted to... a riding lawnmower.

The mower coughs pitifully, like a machine that was EXHIBITION-DRIVEN OFF A CLIFF ONTO A PILE OF RETAINING WALL RUBBLE, and I do not stick around to see what other excitement may yet be in store. I LEAP into my car (quickly checking first that she hasn't unloaded a pile of crap RIGHT BEHIND it, because the odds would normally be high for *that* sort of 'oops -- aren't I funny'). And I'm off! I hyper-alertly drive the full posted 75 interstate MPH, even after speed limit drops to 65, then to 55, pretty much *daring* the Ticket Gods to alert some helpful passing State Patrol Officer. I feel like a daring criminal!!! I park (carefully) in my normal spot and sprint into work, clocking in with ONE MINUTE AND THIRTY TWO SECONDS TO SPARE!

So, when I got home tonight I noticed a riding lawn mower wedged in front of her car in the garage (in all honesty, I half-way expected it to be parked in *my* spot with a friendly request, 'would I mind parking outside for awhile until she finds a place to put it', because that would also be par for the course, *especially*  as we were in the midst of driving rainstorms and PING PONG BALL-SIZED HAIL all evening). The house was completely dark and suspiciously silent, so I will have to wait until tomorrow to hear the full saga of Gettin' The Ridin' Lawnmower Back Into Our Yard and Maneuverin' It Into The Garage, You Betcha. I have to be at work early tomorrow; I'll have to sneak out fast to get away!...

I guess it's true that friends are the people who know all about you but (for sometimes inexplicable reasons) like you anyway. And, as any true friend would, the next time she goes off on someone who's down something differently than she would, and is therefore stupid because of it, and bitterly laments that she is the only goddamn person on the goddamn planet who shows any goddamn sense, I'm going to say, "COFF! ...riding lawn mower.... COFF!"   

In fact, I *may* refer to it on more than one occasion...

                    

So I bought a single speed Dremel™ Rotary Tool, along with a Honkin Pile o'Attachments™ and the optional Flex Shaft Attachment™ a few years ago.  It was quite an expensive purchase at the time and it's been quite useful, but I've been wishing for a variable speed model now as polishing small polymer clay items with the SUPER DUPER MACH 1 ULTRA HIGH SPEED leads to intermittent, unexpected "melting" in a spot or the whiiiiiiinging!  loss of a projecting part.

I've been pricing variable speed models and watching Ebay auctions, but had not committed to anything yet as they are expensive, too, and I won't be using it enough to be casual about the purchase. Then this weekend I was at a chain hardware store on the other side of town and found a 5-speed store brand, without all the redundant attachments, for $19.99! Yay!

The down side is that I am running out of plausible reasons for not perpetrating art...   

I saw this  on Rachel Maddow (link to today's show not up yet, it probably will be by the time you're reading this). Here's yet another example of a Repug re-writing history (not mentioning Democratic leadership during some of the featured vignettes and casting Republican ... bloopers ... in a kinder, gentler light). I didn't know much about Mr. Huckabee when he first came on the national scene, but I was prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt. That is, until I saw him earnestly raising his hand as an IDiot during one of the presidential media circuses.

Perhaps he can get elected to the Texas schoolboards re-writing "biased" U.S. history textbooks if the Faux News thing doesn't work out.

Not very taddy of me, but I can't blithely ignore these people.   

Billy Joel's  The Stranger  could have been the soundtrack for lunch today.

A sometimes volatile co-worker announced that she was really happy about seeing The Donald all over the teevees, was really enjoying him, and laughing and laughing.  When met with raised eyebrows  --[mine included]--  she clarified, "He's raising some questions about our President that we really should be thinking about."


~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~   
It was then I felt the stranger kick me right between the eyes.
~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~    ~ 


I was heartened when one of the quiet, non-assertive ones immediately spoke up and said, "He's an asshole! If there was any legitimacy to questions about where the President was born, he would never have been elected."

Every time I think I've forged some common, hopeful ground with the lifers in this group, something happens to forcibly remind me that I am working for a branch of a Red corporation, located in a Red city in a Red state, and surrounded by racist, ignernt red-necks.


* is clinically depressed *   

So, I turned on the news after getting home from work tonight and saw a chyron on Countdown that the last US troops are leaving Iraq.


Long overdue, especially as they should never have been there in the first place.


Now hoping that the powers that be do not find a way to send each and every one (and more!) to other current hot spots, or create new ones...




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
So, I'm just back for asking [family], "So -- big day today, yeah?"

[family]: What?

me: The news is saying that the last US troops are leaving Iraq! That was recorded earlier, so not sure when that happened...

[family]: Hmmm.
* turns back to personal project, expresses no interest whatsoever *

me: 

I've been a loyal Norton's customer (both platforms as client disks can come from anywhere) since they first came out with a product. But, as of this week, THEY ARE ON NOTICE!*

I again purchased the most expensive bells & smells & whistles package they could foist upon a gullible public last summer, only to have it:

(A) repeatedly turn itself off *all year*, while snottily informing me that my protection had lapsed and I had best pony up another subscription (which required me to laboriously turn it on again or even delete all and reinstall);

or

(B) (an even more infuriating possibility) *allow* itself to be repeatedly turned off by insidious infiltration agents, despite proper regular updates.


I am going to have to see the Geek Squad -- for the second time -- to have my hard drive sterilized, at significant and inconvenient expense, which chaps my ass considering Nortons was supposedly installed and active both times "BankerFox" and "Win32/Nugel.E" squirreled their way onto my hapless desktop.






Alrighty then.

I'm on XP (cannot upgrade at this time as I will lose my software and it's not in the budget to upgrade all of it at the mo.)

Norton's is right out.

What do you recommend, oh technically savvy (and uinfiltrated) siblings? Also, is there anything *I* can do to Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest scrofulous pest?l

Thanks-
-pieces o'desperately keeping teh internets turned off except quick visits to you

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
* Borrowed from Stephen Colbert

The headline story(ies) on HuffPo today center on the newest escapades from the Family Values Party. It will be very interesting -- if not existentially painful -- to watch the spin put on the midterm Congressional elections this fall in order to convince political conservatives that voting for God's Own Party is still the only way to go.

If I know some of my relatives, it will be a very soft sell.   

Here's a thread for exploring the weird and wonderful world of online, niche-market encyclopedias. The best known in the group is probably Wikipedia, and if you've found something bizarre and entertaining there, why not share it?


I'd like to start things off with a project by 23/6: Dikipedia.

This is a bipartisan, international, and by no means complete listing. Although they lambasted a few people I rather like (and made me smile in the process) I think we can all tell who they think are the *real* dicks by persuing a few entries.

Happy reading.   


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Now it's your turn to share a favorite entry in an already listed 'pedia', or, better yet, post a link to another 'pedia' not yet mentioned...

Well. It's all over (except including the shouting at the tv screen)...

Where to begin?
One line that leapt out at me was McCain's cranky-assed insistence that he has always been a reformer.


Also, I'm wondering if that snarky little swipe at Tom Brokaw was a get-even for not playing along with his (McCain's) attempt to "cozy up to the ref" prior to the debate.

Well, we just wrapped up de-Bait #1.

I am exhausted from refuting the tv screen.   




I also said bad words...

Internet Archive

This is one of my favorite sites to drop in on now and then. I was originally tipped off about their collections of classic illustrated childrens' (and other) books and disturbing/comic 50's-era PSA film clips, but find interesting bits in any category I visit. Tonight I was enjoying the Arthur Rackham illustrations in John Milton's Comus (you select the file format you prefer to view on-screen or download).

A bonus is that it's not all English (extremely confusing German films, anyone?  ) or more familiar classic horror, such as  Nosferatu.

My most recent screening was  Le Voyage Dans La Lune; I had only seen *very* short clips or stills of this, so I really enjoyed it.

Happy browsing and please share your best discoveries as well.

PS: Grateful Dead clips are featured in their Live Music Archive right now...

I recently saw Next  (I'm a Nicolas Cage fan)  and recommend it to anyone who likes adventure.





Edit: Darlica, split topic

Blame Credit fer this topic goes t' DaveL, who starrrted hit at TOP. (O'll let 'im poste his luvverly Ode t'a Dugong  his oan self.)  Theyre be sum harrrt-string-tuggin' poetry rit by pyrates, an we should reade hit in thee Portsmouth Monastery, too. Here be wun ov me faverits.


Charge ov thee Loight Brigayde
Alfred, Cap'n Tennis Sun

Haf an arrrrrgh, Haf an arrrrrgh,
Haf an arrrrrgh onworrrd,
Awl in thee galley ov Death
Rowed thee six hunnerd.
"Forworrrrd, thee Loight Brigayde!
Aim fer thee gunwales!" he sayde:
Inter thee galley ov Death
Rowed thee six hunnerd.

"Forworrrd, thee Loight Brigayde!"
Be theyre a mate dismaid?
Not tho thee pyrates new
Sumwun 'ad blunnerd:
Theyres not t'axe 'im why,
Theyres not t'mayke reply,
Theyres but t'dew an' dye:
Inter thee galley ov Death
Rowed thee six hunnerd.

Cannon to thee roight ov 'em,
Cannon to thee left ov 'em,
Cannon in thee front ov 'em
Volleyed and thunnerd;
Storrrrm'd hat wiv shot an shelled,
Boldly they rowed an wailed,
Inter thee jaws ov Death,
Inter thee mouf ov Hell,
Rowed thee six hunnerd.

Flashin theyre cutlas bare,
Flashin theyre arse in aire,
Stabbin thee blaggarrrds there,
Drunkin an barmy woile
Awl thee worlde wunnerd:
Plungin' thru bat-tree smoke,
Roight thru thee loine they broke;
Cronan an Borat
Reeled frum thee cutlass-stroke
Shatterd and sunnerd.
Then sum rowed back, but not--
Not thee six hunnerd.

Cannon to thee roight ov 'em,
Cannon to thee left ov 'em,
Cannon in thee front ov 'em
Volleyed and thunnerd;
Storrrrm'd hat wiv shot an shelled,
Boldly they rowed an wailed,
Inter thee jaws ov Death,
Inter thee mouf ov Hell,
Rowed thee six hunnerd.

When can theyre trezshur fayde?
Oh, thee wylde charge they mayde!
Awl thee worlde wunnerd.
Onner thee reck they mayde!
Drinke t' thee Loight Brigade,
Nobil Six Hunnerd!

Insomnia strikes again...

Here's a little wallpaper design altering the digital labyrinth I drafted for my circle. It's now completely under water and that little blob floating in the middle is a camouflaged toad fish.


If yer gonna be starin atcher compyooter ennyweighs, ye jest as well be sailin thru thee labyrinth t' induce calm an sarennitea an such.

I am requesting tech advice from anyone up to assisting an XP user who is not and will not be using Vista in the forseeable future.

I have a flash video file which I cannot eradicate. RealPlayer never opened it, and I can't move, rename, or delete it because a prompt insists that it is in use by another program. Checking on-line help and a couple how-to's has left me more confused than empowered.

Despite my art degree, I am bright and can learn. 
I just need reassurance -- from someone who actually knows what the heck s/he is doing -- that instructions to 'disable' certain things are ... correct.

Fanks in advance.